


All's Fair in Love and Mischief

by tungstenpincenez



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Crack, Fluff and Humor, Future Fic, Jotunn Biology (Marvel), M/M, Mild Language, Mild Sexual Content, Mpreg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-19
Updated: 2018-02-19
Packaged: 2019-03-21 08:41:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13737234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tungstenpincenez/pseuds/tungstenpincenez
Summary: Loki is not having a good morning.





	All's Fair in Love and Mischief

Loki groaned. He tried for the millionth time to find a more comfortable position in their bed. _Damn those Norns bitches!_ But he knew he couldn’t really blame them. _He_ was the idiot that let _the_ Fertility God talk him into another pregnancy. Now, no thanks to Thor, he was carrying quadruplets. _Damned Jötunn biology!_ The hovering device that “Rusty” Stark had provided was helping whenever he was vertical, but it did nothing for the constant shortness of breath, especially obvious when changing from the vertical to the horizontal and vice versa, nor the constant kicking from his unborn brood. 

“How fare thee, _hjarta minn_?” asked a solicitous voice.

Loki glared. If only he were the God of Thunder, Thor would now be a big pile of burnt ashes. 

Thor gave him a shit-eating grin, knowing full well his beloved’s murderous thoughts. Gently, he ran his hand up Loki’s back, releasing tiny tendrils of lightning to soothe and relax. Loki moaned. Thor performed the healing treatment to every part of Loki’s body and finally pressed a kiss to his consort’s forehead—only to have his chin tugged down and soft lips meet his in a searing kiss. Thor hummed. A pleasant side-effect of his electric massaging technique was that it always made Loki horny. Thor kissed a trail down to Loki’s swollen breasts as his fingers found the soft folds between his consort’s legs. Loki moaned louder, his hips jerking at the touch. Thor groaned as Loki neared release, his hardening cock straining against his pants and awaiting the lubrication he’d be using to find his own release. Ever since they’d discovered about the multiple bundles of joy, Thor had been forbidden from using anything but his fingers to pleasure Loki.

Loki finally cried out. To Thor’s utter amazement, a large gush of plasma-like fluid was emitted and soaked the bed. 

“Cease your idiotic gaping! My water breaketh!”

Thor stumbled to his feet. Unfortunately, his foot caught in his cape and he face-planted onto the marble floor with a painful thud. Under any other circumstance, Loki would’ve laughed until he cried, but his body chose that moment to produce the first huge contraction. He screamed. 

When Loki became aware of his surroundings again, he found himself in Thor’s arms, _en route_ to the Healing Rooms. Thor was sporting a bleeding nose and bruised cheek, but he seemed unaware of his injuries as he reassured Loki that they were almost there. 

Not surprisingly, the labour took a while. Loki screamed and cursed fluently and expressively in seven different languages throughout the ordeal. (The library in the old Asgard was vast, and not all the books were dry academic discourses, you know.) 

At long last, Thor and Loki had their arms full of their newborns, a pair of girls and a pair of boys, all inheriting their father’s blond hair and blue eyes. They gazed in awe. 

When the babies began crying pangs of hunger, Thor suddenly panicked. How was Loki to feed them all?

“Fear not, My Thundering Love, I have long pondered this dilemma and found a solution.” 

With a few waves of his hand (he was still recovering from a long birthing after all), Loki finally succeeded in endowing his _elskr_ with a pair of voluptuous breasts filled with milk. He grinned at Thor’s gobsmacked expression and reassured him that he’d place a glamour so that no one else need ever know.

Of course, what with their penchant for entering a room without knocking, the Warriors Three soon discovered Thor’s altered physique, and, Fandral being the gossipmonger that he was, soon the whole of New Asgard also knew. The local Healing Clinics found line-ups outside their doors as newly-made mothers demanded that their husbands be similarly transformed. To Loki’s astonishment, some of the new fathers quite liked nursing—Thor among them.

Which, sadly, was why he soon found himself knocked up… again.

**Author's Note:**

> The muse has an odd sense of humour. We did agree that a more modern tone is funnier.
> 
> Now with sequels [Deuce and Devilry](http://archiveofourown.org/works/13923837) and [Thorough Flood, Thorough Fire](http://archiveofourown.org/works/15215873)


End file.
